Push a button, see what happens. Press a trigger…not a pretty sight. No, I am not talking about firearms. Although, when certain buttons are pushed or a trigger pressed all hell can break loose. There is a certain metaphoric sound between discharging firearms and an emotional blowout.
(No, not me. Although when the voice takes a certain tone people have been known to take cover. )
Two weeks ago mom suffered a small mental relapse. I had barely entered the room when mom said the sheets were poisoned. Oh, oh. What triggered this little episode is unknown. Was it an infection? Was it a smell which triggered some memory? Was it a news item? Was it a small “mini-stroke?” It was a mystery. That singular comment meant we were back to “someone is trying to kill me.” (Can you hear a deep, deep sigh right about now?) I began to question mom as to why she thought the sheets were poisoned. The response was if the RCMP cannot find out why, how was she to know. They were just poisoned, she couldn’t sleep in them and do not touch them.
For those of you familiar with mental breakdowns or age related dementia difficulties, you know there is nothing you can say which can bring about a change in the thinking. Short of medications or a miracle, I assumed mom would not come out of this for some time. Thankfully, she did and has remained so.
It was very interesting and amazing to watch “reasoning” flood her mind. When I said something, she responded with exasperation that once again I did not believe her. My fervent prayer of “HELP, not again” was quickly answered as I watched mom come out of it. Being a woman of faith, mom began to pray. In her mind, only God would be able to help her. I had not heard mom pray for such a long time. A small miracle as she began to pray took place before me. Just as quickly as she had spoken about poisoned sheets, she came to or into her right mind. On each subsequent visit -she has been cognitive, a little slow formulating some words but her mind is there. Mom was able and is able to carry on a good conversation with me.
So…what happened? Was it physical–a chemical imbalance? Was it dementia? Was it spiritual? Was it an infection? I have my suspicions. And more to the point, will this little relapse stop some of you from visiting?? Oh, yeah, most of you don’t visit. What was I thinking?! For a moment there, I had a spark of hope. Nope, dashed again. Silly me. Now you are not going to visit are you? You are offended once again by sarcasm.
IF.. some of you do decide to visit, take mom outside on the balcony for a little sunshine. We spent some time sitting in the sun before this wicked heat descended upon us.
A little tale–a family member phoned for instructions on how to get out of the city. When I asked “where are you?” The response – “Best Western Hotel” – “oh, right across the street from MOM?” ” Yes, but I don’t have time to visit now.” How about making time!!
I told the ‘big guy” about the phone call. Are you dear family ready for his response? “Did you say ‘If you don’t have time to visit mom, I don’t have time to give you directions out of town.’ ” I guess frustration is reigning everywhere. Interesting response from the Herb–was a button pushed to trigger his response? Or — did that trigger anger and frustration resulting in his button being pushed to respond with anger? The ‘big guy” is usually very easy going. If Herb has had enough of the no visiting, imagine how mama is feeling about the no visits! So perhaps, you should have your map book ready! Perhaps, guilt will get some of you to visit. Perhaps… Nah …. too much to ask or hope for especially of those who live here. Your life is far too busy to make time for an old blind lady sitting in a wheelchair in a nursing home.
A lesson in family dynamics – shake off the dust from the day. People are who they are. Do not give others power over you by holding onto the stuff.
I think we need a little “red sky in the morning, sailor’s warning” or a few less degrees in temperature to cool off this coastland. It is hot, hot, hot.
Make sure your pet has lots of water and a cool spot in the shade. Afterall, they wear fur coats all year long.
Try to stay cool in your part of the world.
**Note: I did not make a typing error, he really is called “the Herb” by an old family friend.