It has been almost two weeks since the “violent” (their words) man moved into the private room beside my mother. Things have progressed into the ugly part of long-term care.
Residents with diminished cognitive powers can be quite vocal, violent, and/or act out sexually. And… we have two out of three. Just what I need, sexually explicit gestures and raised voices directed at my mother and my niece. Oh, and a blue grosgrain strap with a sign, “Do Not Enter” stretched across mother’s doorway. Right. That will keep him out.
Lorna and Colleen were visiting when the “neighbour” pulled the strap away and proceeded to wheel into the room. My niece who does not take any crap from anyone, (that’s my girl!), wheeled him around and told him he could not come in. This happened three or four times, before, he yelled that she was a bad woman while gesturing with his hand and penis. My niece turned him around so fast, marched and wheeled the startled man to the nursing station, where she advised the staff to deal with this problem.
The only solution is to sedate the man. Thankfully, mother was quite calm about the whole thing. My mother, she may be blind and sitting in a wheelchair, but, she can vocalize her disdain, her displeasure, her disgust at the system.
Mama was in fine form on Sunday, she told Lorna to stand up straight and not to slouch. Laughing, Lorna dutifully straightened her shoulders and faced the world. That’s our mother!
Oh, right, they keep telling me she has dementia. She may have a hitch in her thinking, but…she knows when things are not right. Hmm, I believe I was told there would be a volunteer to read to her and spend time talking with her thus keeping her cognitive powers and speech active.
And, how safe is she? A strap across the doorway is not stopping the neighbour from wheeling in. I can hear it now, the strident voice giving him bloody hell for coming in her room.
Now, it is my turn to put on my marching boots. My mother, the matriarch who taught us to stand up straight and speak up for ourselves and take action. Watch me go.