Spinning Thoughts & Tales ~

Attitude adjustment…

Compassion and grace left yesterday.  Packed the suitcase and ran away, screaming into the night air.   I think they walked into the kitchen,  saw all the crumbs, the old teabags, the dirty teaspoons and mugs, the two sugar bowls, the kettle, the teapot, the cereal box, the cereal bowls, the dirty knives, and the perishable food left out.  I think the kicker was the layer of splatter and fat on the stove top. 

Compassion and grace know a convalescing relative needs a nurse, a maid, a cook, and a chauffeur.  And bucket loads of patience.  But, for the love of God, the operation was 16 days ago.  You, (the relative) are walking around, saying you feel strong.  You did not die and we are glad. 

Now, the staples are out.  Your recovery is amazing.   You are going to live a few more years, unless, I snap.  Everyone is calling you, wishing you well.  You are in the home of your favoured one.  We’ve pampered, petted, soothed, well, just about  everything humanly possible to help you, clothe you, feed you, well, you get the picture. 

BUT!  For the love of all things good,  will you please  wipe up after yourself, put the dirty cups and cutlery in the dishwasher, and put the garbage into the bin. 

I am on a rant and roll, here.  I do not want to hear the same news over and over, hour after hour.  Nor, do I want to hear the soap opera, twice a day.  I want the television and the lights off when you go for a nap.  I know you are in pain and bored.  I don’t want to hear about your foot being cold, it is not cold.  It is warm to the touch.  You will live.  It appears the ingrown toe nail is causing more pain than the blood flow back into your foot.

And, for the last time, do not lift up your pyjama top and show your flesh to me again!!  I know you had shingles last year.  I sympathize.  I am sorry. Can we get on with life?

Breathe.  Breathe. 

Okay, rant is over.   The golden rules growing up were ~ be polite, caring, lend a helping hand, clean up after yourself, and remember how you treat people is how people will treat you.  So…I felt guilty for having such a bad attitude, being angry that my work is not being done, and just plain, wanting my house back to peace and quiet, basically, for being bitchy.

SO… I paid it forward.  At Starbucks, I purchased the venti and  fruit plate  order, for the woman in the car behind me.  Does that give me points in the universe?  Does that make it all better?  No?  Alright.  Suck it up.  Square your shoulders and smile.    There are people who are in more dire straits than nursing a relative back to health. This too, shall pass.  This too, shall pass.   This too, shall pass.   Okay, stern talking to myself is over. 

“Compassion and grace come back.  We have another week to go.   And, bring a bucket of patience with you.”

Stay safe.  Stay warm.  Stay loved, where ever you are.


Comments on: "Attitude adjustment…" (11)

  1. {{hugs}}

    Chick needs to pull her pj top down. seriously.

    I’ve been there. It’s possible to love deeply and be a brave and patient caregiver while a snarky monologue spools in your mind like that damn ticker on headline news.

    Must. Not. Smack.

    Screaming’s okay, though.

    • Nice hug, Diva. The poor Big Guy gets a nightly update and a “you owe me big time!” We are going to the jewellery store today.

  2. Carol, you are a fairy godmother, not a saint. And it sounds like even one of the holy angels would be ready to kick your relative’s butt by now.

    I hope jewelry, wine, luxurious bubble baths and peace and quiet find their way to you soon.

    • Thanks, my girl.
      Thursday! Yeah! I love her. She is good. She is also a lot of work even when she is well. I need buckets of patience and must tie up the critical uglies all the time. Attitude adjustment, Carol. Attitude. (That’s my mother speaking.)

  3. Stormy (a.k.a. Bacon Sex Betty) said:

    *sighs with knowing empathy and grabs the venti bag of sprinkles*

    I have just one request, Ms. Saint. When you’re on your way into the jacuzzi with your new necklace and glass of wine, can you close the door behind you before you lift your shirt? (sorry, I couldn’t resist…and by now you know I’ve got this out-in-left-field sense of humor)

    • Ha… funny Stormy. I am not a prude, and, I don’t lift my shirt for just anyone. But, seriously…. I have seen the aging future. I just do not want to see it any old time of the day. How did you know I got a new necklace? It is beautiful, by the way. It’s my birthday present from the Big Guy. He is a love.

  4. Stormy (a.k.a. Bacon Sex Betty) said:

    Birthday? *blinks eyes* Did I miss something while I was wallowing in my own self-pity and having to move back in with my mother? ((groans)) Whenever it was/is, happy birthday.

    And I’m so glad you got my humor. I do understand (without getting into a ME soliloquy) what you’re going through. Perhaps I don’t know the specifics, but it’s funny how we begin our journey vulnerable and incapable, grow to maturity, then wither back into dependence. I’m back in a situation with an ailing mother. But thankfully, she still has her wit about her (yeah, she just reminded me for the umpteenth time that I’m getting my comeuppance from my son for the way I treated her at his age).

    I’ve got a “list”. I don’t do many of them, because I’m dreadful at them. But this is one of which I keep track. It’s my list of daily prayer names. And now you’re on it.


  5. Stormy (a.k.a. Bacon Sex Betty) said:

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  6. I know it is your birthday :) Take a deep breath………and enjoy your day…..and the necklace…….and think of the future !

    Love you ! Happy Birthday to you my friend !!!


    • Ha! Thanks, Pam. I know you know. You know how old I am too. Don’t like this number. Your birthday is coming up and we will get to celebrate in WA. The necklace is very beautiful. It is just this last year he is really going all out on jewellery gifts. At Birks too. Hmmm….This whole survivor cancer thing must have changed him. Or, I am being especially good. HA.

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